I thought about killing myself last night.
I had had a good week off from work; the week ended with a really great birthday celebration for me, and I felt really happy.
And then, well, I didn’t. It came over me like a tsunami, a wave of awful darkness that swallowed me up whole. I laid in bed sobbing, engulfed in pain and feeling like my only way out this time was to end everything. I even clutched a knife in my hands, trying to work up the nerve to end it all.
I didn’t though. I couldn’t. I have too much to live for, too much to be grateful for. I couldn’t imagine doing something that terrible to my wife…to my kids.
The voice wants me to think of myself as a coward. It punishes me with terrible feelings about myself, how worthless I am. But it’s a lie, and I know that. I just have to keep pushing through if I have any hope of surviving.
Each day is a struggle, but I hope I can keep fighting.
The Negative King
The Negative King is a dark and foreboding character in the Dungeon of Depression…and a formidable power to contend with. Although trapped in place within the dungeon itself, the Negative King knows a great deal about who is in the dungeon and where they are, thanks in part to his psychic link to his sentries, the obelisk-bears.
Once the Negative King was another adventurer, lost in the depths of the dungeon itself. He lost his way, lost his party, and ultimately became trapped eternally within the dungeon itself. Now the Negative King is a shell of his former self; empty robes wrapped around the self loathing and self hatred that consumed this young adventurer. He spends his time sitting upon a throne made from his own bones, waiting for new victims to come his way.
He can lash out with his anger at others, dealing psychic damage, but all of this anger stems from his own feelings about himself. It may be possible to calm him down, to reason with him and ultimately get him to let go of his self hatred, but the chances are slim. Sadly, it is too late for the Negative King.
As an encounter, the Negative King is a formidable foe, with many psychic powers at his disposal. Defeating him is a strenuous activity meant to drain and deplete the PCs. However, the Negative King is far from the “final boss” of this dungeon…there are terrible things much worse than him, deeper within the dungeon.
The Negative King may even hint as such, possibly mentioning an awful monster elsewhere in the dungeon that even he is afraid of.